Brutally honest? I’ll give you brutally honest.
One of my girlfriends just had her third child, and my niece her first. My nephew’s wife is pregnant with their first, and a friend of ours just had his first. And I do NOT long so much to have another baby.
I wish I could do it all over again – pregnancy, birth, breastfeeding a newborn. Even two months of unrelenting nausea (OMG, that nausea!) and sleep-deprived nights up with a gassy baby. I’d do it again in a heartbeat.
Wasn’t the video of the giggling, breastfeeding baby I posted yesterday NOT the cutest? Seeing that baby nurse reminded me of those precious moments of breastfeeding L when he was that little.
But on the other hand, life with just Landon is perfect. He is perfect. He’s healthy and the most mellow, gentle, sweet little boy.
L gets a lot of mommy and daddy attention by being an only child, and he hasn’t ever mentioned that he’d like a brother or a sister. But it makes me sad when I see L want to play with other kids so badly when he is around them. And he would be a wonderful, attentive, helpful big brother, but they would be six or seven years apart.
Now that L is in kindergarten, I have more time to do what I love so much besides being a mommy — making a living with blogging and social media consulting. I’m so blessed — with this amazing little boy, a husband I love, and a career that I adore. And we are working on another big project that is a dream of mine that keeps me busy.
Why chance it and throw a baby into the mix? Things are easier now. Why risk that it would be too much — for us as a couple, for us as a family, for my body? What if the child wasn’t healthy because of my age?
I don’t ever want to hear, “YOU are the one who wanted a second one!” It would crush me.
Saying it would be a stretch financially would be an understatement. I wouldn’t be able, or willing, to work much at first, but we need a second income. All around it wouldn’t be a smart or practical decision. And I’m usually very practical. I feel selfish to even think of having another child.
But sometimes I wish I was 10 years or even five years younger — I think then I would throw caution to the wind and have another baby. And keep that highchair I just cleaned up for an hour so I can resell it.
Because being practical is overrated.
Baby Blues? NOT me!
{Not Me! Monday! is a blog carnival by MckMama. You can head over to her blog to read what she and everyone else has not been doing this week.}
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{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }
I could have written this post, word for word. I have my one and only. I sometimes yearn and sometimes ache. Sometimes for his sake and sometimes for mine. But at my age and his (he just turned 5), I think our family is complete with three.
I have to say I feel the opposite… I have been thinking long and hard about having a third baby. I am 33, so I don’t feel like I have more than a year or so to mull it over. I just keep thinking about having older kids, adult children and wanting our family to be bigger and more fun. Of course I still need to convince my husband.
I so miss Not Me! Mondays.
I was always like that with wanting a 3rd child. But after having so much trouble with the first two, I wasn’t brave enough. Now that I am knocking on 40, I sometimes regret not trying. I think. Maybe not.
Thanks for sharing this post!
Nice post…captures my feelings as well…even tho I am WAY past baby making days!
I struggle with that too, I have only one child (with eczema) – Marcie. (I’m even known as MarcieMom!) It’s still difficult raising a child w eczema, constantly having to watch out for scratching. How do I have the energy and the money (not cheap with all the moisturizers, 500ml per week) to have another child? Yet EVERYONE is telling me they don’t regret a second child and see that it’s better for the first child. I even blogged a post about it here, ‘Should I have only one child?’ http://eczemablues.com/2011/12/is-it-ok-to-have-only-one-child/
OMG, adorable onesie on that adorable baby!!!
Isn’t that the cutest?
The only thing I can say is that my girls were 23 months apart and two children was more than double one in every aspect. I am now taking care of my granddaughter who is three and realize what I missed by having two children so close together. It is so much fun enjoying one little one without having to divide time and energy all day long.
It is a personal choice if or when to have another child…choose what is right for you and your family. :)
I hear you loud and clear! I too am a mom of a five yr old son and am happy – usually- with having one child. Jack is also very happy being an only child. But I get those pangs and thoughts of why didn’t I start having children earlier!!! Its all natural and you do need to do what is best for your family.